blogger

Did I mention I moved back over to blogger? I imported all of my wordpress posts and took the show over there. I don’t really have a good reason other than I felt like I needed  fresh start and didn’t want to start an entirely new blog. so from now on  you can find me here!

Stumbling on Happiness

I am about half way through this really amazing book called Stumbling on Happiness which discusses how the human brain predicts the future and more specifically how terrible a job it does causing us to wrongly predict what will make our future selves happy. The book discusses perception, imagination, and memory in a very engaging way using psychology, neuroscience, philosophy and several other disciplines. Half way through I’ve already learned a lot of new things about the mind. Below is a quote I came across while reading this afternoon and wanted to share. It clearly illustrates one of the most interesting things I’ve learned from this book (so far).

To give you some context, the paragraphs leading up to this example discuss how people are really bad at predicting their own emotional responses because when predicting the future its difficult to consider and factor in those things we don’t consider. Meaning, there are always factors we fail to consider when predicting/imagining future responses and these ignored factors are those which will fundamentally impact our future emotional response.

[M]ost Americans can be classified as one of two types: those who live in California and are happy they do, and those who don’t live in California but believe they’d be happy if they did. Yet, research shows that Californians are actually no happier than anyone else – so why does everyone (including Californians) seem to believe they are? California has some of the most beautiful scenery and some of the best weather in the continental United States, and when non – Californians hear that magic word their imaginations instantly produce mental images of sunny beaches and giant redwood trees. But while Los Angeles has a better climate than Columbus, climate is just one of many things that determine a person’s happiness – and yet all those other things are missing from the mental image. If we were to add some of these missing details to our mental images of beaches and palm trees – say traffic, supermarkets, airports, sports teams, cable rates, housing costs, earthquakes, landslides, and so on – then we might recognize that L.A. beats Columbus in some ways (better weather) and Columbus beats L.A. in others (less traffic). We think that Californians are happier than Ohioans because we imagine California with so few details – and we make no allowance for the fact that the details we are failing to imagine could drastically alter the conclusions we draw.

Sewing

Yesterday Living Social was offering a deal for Common Thread Studio in South Pasadena. They offer varying levels of sewing classes including introductory classes! For once Living Social offered a deal for something I ACTUALLY want to do!

I spent most of yesterday going back and forth between my email to read the details of the deal and Common Thread’s website to see what the business is all about. Finally I just decided to pull the trigger and buy the deal. I need to branch out and try new things and this sounds like a good step!

Common Thread has great reviews online and their classes sound amazing! The Living Social Deal is for a Level 2 sewing class and 20% off an introductory class. The best part is that is doesn’t expire until October 2012 so I have time to find Intro Sewing and Level 2 classes that fit my schedule.

I cannot wait to tell you all about my experiences at Common Thread!

bunker pants

I never really got the whole “men in uniform are sexy” thing. I’m just not one of those women. Don’t get me wrong, I can appreciate the beauty a well tailored dress uniform but uniforms don’t really do it for me the way they do it for some people.

Apparently though I find bunker pants sexy (or maybe I just find firemen sexy?). I’m not talking about their dress uniforms worn for special events, I’m talking about the gear they actually wear when running into fires. We’ve been watching Rescue Me (A LOT) and are waiting for the final two season to arrive in the mail so we can see how the show ended. During the course of the five seasons we’ve seen so far I’ve pretty much fallen in love with some of the characters. Sure, they’re alcoholic, womanizing, degenerates but a good TV show makes you love people like that and want to be friends with them.

The weirdest thing though is that watching this show I’m finding myself oddly attracted to Dennis Leary. I think it has something to do with all the really cool FDNY gear he wears on this show – from tshirts, to jackets, to pullovers. But really, I think it has to do with those bunker pants with the overalls.

Am I the only one who finds those pants and that sweater sexy? Am I just intrigued by the character and in turn find myself attracted to Dennis Leary? Then again, I also really love his hair and something about his voice. But there is definitely something about those pants. I clearly have a problem.

Love the One You’re With.

What I had yet to learn, though, is that things are seldom as neat and tidy as that starry – eyed anecdote you share documentary style on a couch. What I figured out over time is that almost always, when you hear those stories from married couples, there is a little poetic license going on, a romantic spin, polished to a high shine over time. And unless you marry your high school sweetheart (and even sometimes then), there is usually a not-so-glorious back story. There are people and places and events that lead you to your final relationship, people and places and events you’d prefer to forget or at least gloss over. In the end, you can slap a pretty label on it – like serendipity or fate. Or you can believe that it’s jus the random way life unfolds.

Love the One You’re With By Emily Giffin

WORD.

Hoarding – Wedding Edition

So hoarding probably isn’t the right word. It is a bit strong. I’m planning ahead not hoarding.

I realized a few weeks ago that between now and June I need to buy a lot of odds and ends for the wedding. I didn’t actually realize this until I finished booking most of the big stuff and sat down to figure out what else needed to be done. Surprisingly, the list ended up being quite a bit longer than I expected. So I came up with a plan of attack. My plan is to buy things slowly over the next few months and cart them with me to NJ each time I visit – which should be about two more times before I get there the week before the wedding. I also really want to plan ahead to reduce the chances that I’ll forget something and spend the week before running around like a crazy person.

Aside from accessories for me (shoes, jewelry, strapless bra (ugh!)) the list is made op of things like bridesmaids gifts, a wedding gift for joe, cake serviceware, favors, and a few other things. About two weeks ago I started attacking the list by placing my first two orders.

After telling my mom that I wanted a bubble send off after the church ceremony she went and ordered about a billion of these:

So with about a billion little bottles of bird bubbles I decided to order some personalized ribbon to tie around the necks of the bottles.  The ribbon arrived today and I am really happy with how it came out.

I also ordered a lilafrances hanger which obviously isn’t something I needed for the wedding (let’s be honest weddings don’t need any of this) but really wanted because I think they’re absolutely lovely.  I ordered a personalized mahogany hanger similar to the one below.

Over the next few months I have several more things to buy but am really happy I started taking care of this now. Its give me time to think about what I need but also to shop around and catch sales. Did I mention I got both the ribbon and hanger on sale? My obsessive planning is paying off.

Next on my list – shoes and a strapless bra!

Kate Spade Swooning

Have you seen these new items from Kate Spade?Adorable, right?! I registered for quite a few Kate Spade items through Macy’s but none of these beauties are available. Oh how I hope they make their way to Macy’s. How great would a cake or some cupcakes look on that wonderful cake plate? And some wonderful hors d’oeuvres on the lovely little tray? Joe’s aunt makes these delicious little toast points with goat cheese, prosciutto, and fig jam. I’m thinking they would look lovely on this tray!

Dear Florist

Please respond to my emails in a timely manner. I know it is over 8 months until my wedding but I need my contract with all the correct terms. Especially considering you already deposited the check I wrote you to secure the date. I get that you’re recommended by my venue, have won Best of Weddings 2011 (and several other years) by The Knot, and have great reviews online but seriously, I am a long distance planner and this is giving me a headache. Also, I would just like you to reply to my emails considering I have real questions that you have yet to answer.

You are the only vendor who is not as on it as I am and you’re stressing me out.

Signed,

Jennifer

Miniatures

It’s a little known fact that if you go to the 9th Floor Cafeteria of the Courthouse in Downtown Los Angeles you can walk right out onto the roof.

Ok, well I don’t know that this is a little known fact but I’m guessing most people don’t assume you can just walk out onto the roof of a government building and mill about.

Regardless of how widely known this is, this is in fact something you can do. A few months ago, when I used to take my lunch up to that cafeteria I would step outside to walk around and make phone calls. On one of my jaunts I took this photo of the Walt Disney Concert Hall. I love this building because it is just as beautiful on the outside as it is on the inside. I love this picture because somehow it makes the concert hall look like a miniature version of itself.

Rescue Me

Do any of you guys watch Rescue Me? The series ended last week after  a seven season run on FX. It stars Dennis Leary and (to describe the show in the most simplistic way possible) it is about a FDNY firehouse post 9/11. While 9/11 is a recurring topic in the show it is in no way the entirety of the show.

My parents love it and I caught a few minutes of the second to last episode the other night as they watched the final two episodes. The bit I saw was enough to make me curious so I’ve started watching from the beginning on Netflix. I’m six episodes in and I’ve fallen in love. I spent two days in NYC on this trip back east and that time coupled with this show makes me miss home so much my heart aches. I am so sad (and disappointed in myself) that it took me leaving NYC to really realize how much I love it.

I also started watching the show because of its attention to a post 9/11 firehouse. Let me explain – I only realized a few days before leaving for NJ that heading home would coincide with the 10th anniversary of September 11th. This absolutely did not occur to me when I was booking the ticket. While I think of that day quite often, when I booked I was focused on getting dates right, securing good fares, and being able to fit in all the appointments I needed to make. Then the week we were supposed to leave arrived and I was hit in the face with all the news coverage. I don’t think I’ve ever expressed my memories/experiences of that day in any detailed way on this blog. I don’t  intend to but I do want to say something about how I’ve been feeling this week.

This anniversary – maybe because it marks 10 years or maybe because it being 10 years resulted in a lot of coverage and commentary being in my face a lot sooner than I expected it – forced me to confront a lot of feelings and memories I realized I’d never dealt with. I tried to meet my fears/memories/pain head on in an effort to combat the coverage. That plan didn’t work.

I will explain by telling you just a few simple things about my memories of that day – I remember moments, snapshots, snippets, and feelings but my sense of timing for that day is absolutely non existent. I remember landmark moments in my interaction with the events of that day and have no sense of where they fall chronologically. Add to this the fact that once I got home, all I remember is watching these terrible images on the news. I don’t remember what was said or explained. I just remember at some point we could not watch anymore, for a lot of reasons, and then I sobbed myself to sleep and asked my parents if there was going to be a war. I do not remember watching any news after that. I may have but I honestly do not remember.

I’ve spent the better part of the last 10 years trying to bury my head in the sand and it worked well if you consider repressing feelings working well. For the last 10 years I have refused to watch the news on 9/11 or read the paper in the days leading up. I have completely ignored the coverage. I’d do one obligatory thing each year involving my family and that was it.

Then this anniversary came and the coverage felt more pervasive than in past years. I don’t actually know if that is true but it felt that way. So I responded to it by letting it in. I read and watched and tried to digest. The result? I started to orient myself within my day, line my memories up chronologically, face what it was that happened to my city, my home, my country, me, and it hurt. It hurt like it had just happened. I allowed myself to learn and feel all the things I’d shut out 10 years ago and it opened wounds I had ignored for a decade. Eventually, I turned off the spigot and stopped myself. I’d had enough and needed to digest what I’d learned/rediscovered.

Then I arrived in New Jersey and prepared myself for spending time in NYC. I spent nearly all day September 10th in Manhattan and I am so happy I did. I hit the pavement, rode the subway, hid under an awning when I got caught in a passing rain shower, and ate at a great alehouse in Greenwich Village. Then I went back to NYC on Monday September 12 and had a ball. Do you know what I saw both times? A beautiful and vibrant city, full of amazing and diverse people, persevering, pulsing, and moving forward, living their lives. While I still hurt from the pain of that day it has receded some. Moved to the background. It is still there but it has been overtaken by the pain of heartache and longing. Coming back to NYC and seeing first hand its strength and resilience made me miss home more than anything.

I miss and love NYC even with all its faults. I’m still not entirely through the feelings my little experiment stirred up but I can tell you that my time in NYC this week reminded me how just how amazing my city is, along with all the people in it. Somehow the opening sequence of Rescue Me stirs that feeling of love and pride in me. It was totally unexpected and still is every time I watch an episode.